my academics throughout my primary and secondary school life were very poor. its thru gods grace and mercy that he didnt put me in em3 or normal stream.. i was lucky to be in em2 and in the express stream. sometimes i just ask myself, why my academics so lan? people around me braggin about their results/ scores in school, but i would just try to aviod peoples attention if they'd ever asked me about my results.. this is probably theanswer i found myself that resulted in my poor academics skills throughout my school life..

they say eatting fish is good for the brain as it boosts the IQ power. we probably agree. since young, i had never eaten a fish before, even until now. not that i hate or dont like to eat fish. but i developed some sort of phobia in being choked by the fish bones. eating fish is fine. but being choked by the fish bone is terrible for me.. many time when i was young, i even dreamt i got choked in fish bones but its actually just my saliva.. lol.

ive eaten chicken, beef, pork, mutton, crab, prawns.. anything but fish. even in restaurants or fast food outlets, i dont eat any dish that has the word fish. yeah, thats why people dont see me eating fish burgers or fish and chips.. truthfuly speaking, ive never eaten them before.. haha..

anyway, maybe because of this, my IQ level is pretty low.. actually i think also think quite slowly.. i did the IQ test on the web before.. people get what 150+ pts, mine was like some 40+ pts... so sad.. haha..

yeah and this is also why i always run away from reciting the 'golden verses' in sunday school.
people take 3 hrs to memorise them, it'll take me 3 days to memorise them. i didnt had the time then, as i had more problems with my studies..

i didnt tell anyone about this. i always get the feeling that people would just snigger at me for being soo stupid.. arghh..

now after o levels, some people say that we should choose the course that interests us the most. agree. when people walk past me, they told me its good that i study in NAFA, as its my interest.
but what most people wont understand why i choosed NAFA.

my academic already sux liao, i would die terribly if i had choose science, or business, or engineering, or IT courses.. that is why i try to bank in design courses, as i dun really have to study anything. it just requires you to be more creative, and be able to think out of the box. Temasek Poly has the best design courses. bloody TP dun wanna take me in.. and my aggregate soo high so sux..

it is actually because i have nowhere to go that NAFa is my last choice.
not that i have a keen interest in design, okay i do have a slight interest. but anyway my artwork also not very good. in terms of ranks, im considered above average liao.. i darenot say that my design is the best, cause there still are many other people who are older than me, have more expirence than me and are much much better than me, and im competing with them.

just because i study in NAFA, doesnt mean my artwork, drawing is good. i dont really have the confidence lah.. anyway nobody thinks my designs are nice anyway..

its jus.. arghh.. nobody will understand this lah.. haaiz..
since im already on this road liao, i might as well endure on.. alone..